I have a brief history with dance, like an on-again off-again love affair which began in the 80s and which I still can’t shake. When Charlie was officially diagnosed with cerebral palsy and then later, when he received his first wheelchair, “dance” in the traditional sense seemed out of the question. But then we discovered swim therapy and horseback riding therapy and suddenly all these things I thought were impossible were not only doable but …

I am sitting in a tiny chair around a tiny table with four other adults, including my husband. Everyone has folders and pens. I wish I had something to hold, something to pretend to take notes on other than my phone which keeps lighting up with reminders to “pick up the kids” from the preschool which I am now at. I turn it face down on the tiny table. I do not want to be …

It is six years ago and I have the onesie with the elephant on it in my purse with “Mommy and Me” stitched on it. I have cut holes in the feet so the little probe that measures my son’s heart rate and oxygen levels stays visible and secure at all times. So, no footie pajamas. I thought he’d be home by Mother’s Day. It has been eight weeks since he was born and entered the …

Imagine your least favorite teacher, the English teacher who thought everything you wrote was lame, the foreign language teacher who never let you say one word in English during class, or the chemistry teacher who wished the students weren’t there to get in the way of the science. Chances are, they ruled their classroom like a ship at sea. They were the captains and, if you wanted to get home alive, you did as they …

Nails on a chalkboard is a cliché for a reason. Everyone can imagine the drawn out screeeeeeeek that triggers the involuntary shiver. Here’s another: close your eyes and imagine a knife scraping across a dinner plate. Think of that mind-crunching sound. For my son, the world is his dinner plate. We spend most of our time dodging noise. But noise isn’t the only sensitivity for kids with sensory processing disorders. For some, it’s the feel …

It’s nearly impossible to focus this time of year when flowers are blooming and cool mornings give way to mellow afternoons. We are all ready to break from routines and shake of the stiffness of winter. But if your child has special needs, routines are important and getting that energy out if you have a physical disability brings its own challenges. And yet, they feel the need to move and the desire to embrace the …

It’s getting easier, but I’m no dummy. I know that I’m not out of the woods yet.  As my kids age, I’m going to need more, rather than less help for all the new things…the special needs that change with the seasons, the precarious family balance that is always shifting, the 401Ks and the college funds. I’m going to need serious intervention and I want a person (or many) around me whom I can mine …

Even if you haven’t heard of Maslow’s “Hierarchy of Needs,” you can feel it in your bones. In 1943, psychologist Abraham Maslow came up with this handy pyramid to explain when, why, and how we are motivated. Here’s how it goes: Way down at the bottom, at our most basic level, we have to have our physiological needs met. If you were a baby, innocent and helpless, these are the things you’d need first. Things …

We all say we just want to keep our kids “happy, healthy, and safe” but if we’re honest, that’s not possible all at once and all of the time. I wrote for The Washington Post​ today on the endless trade-offs we makes as parents–the one “plus” we split into three semi-decent “status quos” in order to keep the balance. It is an endless game of give and take.

So, the “twin thing” really is a thing. It starts in the womb. When I first found out I was having twins, I felt them ganging up almost immediately. They kicked and slept and hiccupped in tandem. When they made their debut, I am fairly sure they negotiated a crying cycle that shouldered out even a minute of silence. I gave thanks that they were not identical, that I had a boy and a girl …