When Giving Up is Best
JAMES 1:12
12 Blessed is the one who perseveres under trial because, having stood the test, that person will receive the crown of life that the Lord has promised to those who love him.
When my childhood church built a new sanctuary, all the kiddos got to go in and write verses on the concrete foundation. I was twelve at the time. James 1:12 is what I scribbled in permanent marker in a corner of the would-be “bridal suite” (at my mom’s suggestion…oh boy).
That verse in James was most fitting for me, the future valedictorian. I loved the word “persevere”—the sharpness of it on my tongue and the idea of rough and ready diligence that could take me anywhere.
JAMES 1:5
5 If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you.
But what I did not know and what took DECADES to learn is where to invest that perseverance. If I had scanned upwards to verse five, I would have seen that before perseverance must come wisdom, otherwise, I am Samuel chasing after all the meaningless things (insert: unfulfilling career at a publishing company, scrolling through Facebook for upwards of an hour, that miserable Iron Fist Marvel spinoff on Netflix).
This is still my habit—that ingrained need to finish what I’ve started even when I know, I just know, it is the wrong thing to pursue. And the world tells us that determination and this kind of pushing beyond all limits will result in excellence, in the kind of euphoria that only comes from getting to the top of the mountain. But sometimes it’s the wrong mountain.
God calls us to leave some things unfinished.
He tells us to walk away, to stop the chase of things that will not lead to appropriate fruits. He told the Israelites to stop trying to hoard manna in the desert—they had to trust that more would come. He gave the people in Judges rest from war—stop conquering or defending and cease your battles for a time. And he tells all of us, much like David, to be still and wait patiently for the Lord to reveal himself…to stop comparing to everyone else who is succeeding in exactly the things you yourself are trying to succeed in, to stop spinning in circles over the pursuits that leave you tired and empty.
PSALM 37:7
Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for him; do not fret when people succeed in their ways…”
Instead, we are all called to sit at times and BE STILL. And in that stillness, God might just say, Leave this job or project or relationship that is not working. Sometimes giving up on the thing you thought you had to have is the only way to hear what might be better. And God does have something better in mind. He always will, because He knows us better than we know ourselves. To pursue what we were not designed for is to waste the precious time we have been given.
ISAIAH 30:15
15 This is what the Sovereign Lord, the Holy One of Israel, says:
“In repentance and rest is your salvation, in quietness and trust is your strength, but you would have none of it.”
So here’s my prayer for you and me: May we sit in the stillness and hear when to persevere and when to change course.
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A big thank you from Jamie on The Mom Gene!
