Do you remember the Y2K freak out? Were you one of the people in Time Square partying like it was your last night on earth? Are you still using up those canned goods and toilet paper from your emergency cache? Nobody knew what to do when the binary code flipped over, except the computer nerds of course. They never lost their cool. I’m a nerd myself, but I’m a literature-loving, crossword-working, NPR-listening geek. I can’t …

In my head, I carry a spreadsheet that consists of several pages with two running columns. The first column contains the imminent. The second column contains the long term, marathon-not-sprint, items. The twins share a page. Jody and I share a page. Charlie has a page. The Twin Page: Imminent: Long Term: Feed breakfast. Get them to navigate the food all the way to their mouths instead of their laps. Change the poopy diaper before …

Everybody touts the benefits of mastering the art of empathy. Feel your feels! It’s true, this is crucial. Empathy creates compassion, which fuels activism. It creates a fighter for the bullied, the oppressed, and the underrepresented. It builds a barrier against callousness. It’s the perfect vaccine against jadedness and cynicism. Hence, every parent wants to be an Atticus educating a Scout. We want them to walk in another person’s shoes for a little bit to gain …

I saw a man in a dress and a wig walking a dog around the park not too long ago. It was a flowery dress, one with hibiscus and palm leaves trailing down the front. The wig was red, a knock-off Lucille Ball, but it worked. The dog was little and crazy-happy to be walking out in the sunshine on this Saturday afternoon in August. The man was talking to himself, somewhat angrily, and his …

My son gently placed a booger in my hand at the zoo the other day, and I thanked him. On the way to the trash can, he analyzed the size, shape, and viscosity. I nodded in agreement. We were examining his ecosystem. When did this happen? When did I cross over to the other side of gross? How did I lose the “ick” factor? I’ve never been squeamish. Cuts don’t bother me. I’ve never fainted …

“Your love keeps lifting me higher than I’ve ever been lifted before (keep on, keep on lifting me…higher and higher)” I did. I sang a little Jackie Wilson to Charlie this last week and danced a very gentle jig as we rode up and down and up and down on his new wheelchair lift. This was a big thing coming for us. Months and months of working with a special needs contracting company and volunteer …

“Get off the kitchen counter.” In and of itself that doesn’t seem like such a bad statement when your twin toddlers are standing on the granite countertop lobbing crayons into your newly-filled coffee cup. I left out all the choice adjectives between “the” and “kitchen.” But I yelled it – yelled it eight decibels too loud for a rational person. Animals around the world froze to listen. We’ve all done or said something that merits …

“Ma’am, can I help you with that?” I nod and unkink my back while the boy collecting carts in the parking lot at the grocery store bends down and scoops up my fallen sunglasses. He does it in one fluid motion that reminds me of a surfer riding out a wave. No biggie, man. It is a biggie to me as I try to stand with the dignity of a young-ish woman. I give up …

Neither rain nor drought, neither pool nor park crowds, neither pollen nor pollution will keep me inside this summer. These are vows I have taken and will abide by for the remainder of the season. You can add bugs to this list, too – for better or worse. After last summer, we know the risks of Zika and how to stay prepared. We know that fire ants are nicknamed “red devils” for good reason, and …

Having two children pulled out of my uterus seemed barbaric, but I kissed their goopy heads all the same. Once they were clean, sleeping, and smelling of milk and the doctors had put me back together again, I thought the barbarity was over and that we were on our way to becoming civilized. Silly me. I’ve just spent the last three years trying to make something human out of these two. As twins go, they could …